Once upon a time, this woman prioritized a world of fiction over company time. As a result, she got fired, leaving her an unemployed, single parent. Today, she stands an inspiration to millions.  She sends shivers down my spine. Figured out who I’m referring to yet? 

So how did she make the jump? The answer is in the title: She chose.

Even when she chose to abide by the path society had laid out for her- there came a point when she had to see her passion through- as risky as it was. Everything thereafter was as they say ‘history’.

"Failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me"
J.K Rowling

This was how she stayed strong through the good and the bad. Ultimately, J.K Rowling chose what mattered most to her; she stayed true to the energy within her, the energy we’re all taught to tame. 


It’s easy to get caught up with everyone around you- we are social animals, it’s just the way we are wired. But when something sings to you, what do you do? Observe it and let the moment pass, or chase after it as if your life itself depended on it? I’m not sure either option is healthy or safe. Both have the potential to leave you eternally dissatisfied with a side of regret. I guess that’s how we get to the middle ground and get comfortable with walking the beaten path. It must be the safest route- why else would there be so many footprints in *said* direction. That’s the difference between personalities like J.K Rowling and the rest of the world I suppose. When backed into that corner, it’s less of a choice and more a decision out of need which drives them. The need to see something through- regardless of the consequence. It’s a bit crazy when you think about it. I encourage you to read more about her journey. It’s truly inspirational. 


The thing about choosing yourself is that you can’t afford to compare yourself to others. When I was younger, I’d often feel like a misfit, still do, but now I stand proud in my differences, unlike before. I was lucky to have very supportive people in my life from the beginning, one of whom constantly said to me, “You’re like a fish trying to climb a tree. Stop. Understand yourself, work with your element.” This statement has more magical undertones with each passing day.


Choosing yourself usually means more sacrifice, more guess work, more risk, more anxiety inducing situations, more disappointment, more heartache. But it’s basic logic: more risk = more reward. The reason you stand to be more disappointed or anxiety ridden is because it matters that much more to you- it possesses that capacity to add that magical spark to your life very few things can and like anything else, there’s a give and take involved. 

I’ve come to accept there’s a fluidity to personality, and with that understanding
it became easier to find myself.

Some things I’ve learnt: 


  • Time cannot be spent in the same way your social unit may spend it. That would be like trying to buy a four-course meal with ten dollars and wondering how the others got more than just one doubles. Different appetites, different payment. Don’t try to satisfy yours by watching another.


  • Self-confidence is a necessity 


  • If you don’t ask, you’ll never know. 


  • Seek out new experiences– it will only add to your discovery, your process, your mission. 


As I said, I’m still learning this lesson. Maybe this is one we can go through together. How are you choosing yourself? What are you learning? What scares you most about this process? What do you love most about this process?


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