SARAYU is what I hope to define myself by, yet I’ve not been able to bring myself to write for over a month.
It’s frustrating- why would anyone ignore what they enjoy?
How can the very thing which excites you also intimidate you?
That’s basically what’s been happening since my exams have come to a close.
I suppose none of us are immune. The question now is, “Where do I go from here?” When you catch yourself feeling similarly, I hope what I’m discovering now helps you in some way.
Food is amazing! But my preferences won’t help nor hurt anyone. On my gravestone, I won’t want “She loves pasta” to be etched.
If you knew you were dying tomorrow, would you care to recall the amount of series you binge watched on Netflix? You won’t care if the laundry was done. None of these things would matter.
What matters is making an impact toward something you hold dear to your heart, knowing you didn’t just care; You cared enough to do something to propel the engine which will ultimately contribute to the change you seek. We are cherished for our impact, remembered for the art we leave behind, whatever form it may be in, and perhaps it is the closest we shall get to immortality.
Still, too many times opportunities are lost to fear. Be it in the form of procrastination, self-doubt, being an outcast etc.
I’ve begun comparing fear to quicksand.The important part is getting unstuck.
The more you struggle and fight to get out-the more it sucks you in. It’s not impossible to get out of quicksand though. Ironically, the key is to keep calm and move strategically.
Maybe it’s the fear of moving in the wrong direction that paralyzes us, or worse, propels us to overthink and overreact. These big steps have the weight of a life altering choice which I suppose is what’s most intimidating. In the end, it’s no wonder so many of us end up feeling scared and stuck. “I want to blog but I don’t know where to start.” “I want to start a business but does this mean I should quit my job?” “I want to start a twitch channel but I don’t have the proper equipment to be a professional gamer.”
I’m realizing that making a choice doesn’t mean sentencing yourself to a path for life- it is a rough sketch and you can always change your mind or improve upon your foundation. What seems to matter is whether the leap was taken or not.
The consequence of this is that it’s near impossible to actually plan life, but it doesn’t mean we can’t have an idea of where we would like to settle in this world. In a way, life is not just the result of love, it is love.
It is unpredictable as it is exciting, seems like forever exists when the promise of tomorrow is never present, meant to be shared while also enjoyed in moments of solitude. Ultimately, it’s up to us to get out of our cave and restart the journey.
